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Something I love to do is drive around scouring the area for thrift shops, yard sales and auctions. At one thrift store I was checking out the old paintings and such when I came across this cool looking painting of a lighthouse with ship out on a stormy sea. The painting was in a nice old frame with glass and the price was right. Took it home cleaned it up and hung it on the wall. A day or two later I kept noticing roaches on the wall, on the rug, crawling across me when sitting watching TV. “Aha!” I took the painting out of the frame and voila loads of roaches!!!! So, if you ever buy a painting take it out of the frame and inspect it then clean it thoroughly.

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My ex from a fourteen year relationship occasionally worked odd hours, I’d call him at work to ask what he wanted for dinner and to cheer him up a bit. Then, over the course of three months, there would be ad hoc times when I’d call his desk phone but get no answer so I’d call his mobile, initially thinking he had probably finished earlier than anticipated and was on his way home (and to check that he wasn’t keeping me hanging while he went off to the pub without telling me).

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So I’d call his mobile and ask ‘where are you?’. A few times he would indeed ‘be on his way home’ – yet things were off. I’d never told him that I could often tell when he was lying, he had a certain smugness about him when he did it, sometimes he would even have a particular smirk that he would do when he thought I wasn’t looking (and I can ‘hear’ someone’s facial expression when they are on the phone – probably due to many work hours and long distance boyfriends in the past). He would claim that he had just left the office yet there would be dead silence in the background, none of the usual urban sound of cars going by or his footsteps on the pavement etc.

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Or he would be ‘walking to the train station’ but I could here someone in court shoes clearly keeping step beside him for the duration of the call. I began to chat even longer just so I could listen to what was going on around him. I didn’t let on and he grew ever bolder. He started telling me that he was still at his desk. Lol. He worked in an open plan cavernous office yet he was clearly in a small enclosed area when he answered the phone – even in silence the two sound distinctly different. Sometimes he even answered the phone and chatted to me whilst lying on his back.

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I did eventually confront him (there were plenty of other clues too) and I used the fact that I had previously called his desk phone immediately before reaching him on the mobile for the last three months as one of the reasons I believed he was having an affair at work. What I didn’t tell him was the fact that I could also read the background noise so I knew he wasn’t where he claimed to be. Two weeks later he called from work one night to say that he had missed out on getting a pizza delivered to work for dinner (something he never did) and the pizza delivery guy had given up trying to call on his desk phone to get the front door opened – but the phone never rang.

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It isn’t much, but every Friday some coworkers and I went out to eat lunch. We were in the heart of downtown and just down a little way was a Hard Rock Cafe. I had never been to any of them, because I thought a place like that was just a very expensive burger joint, and I was correct. It was always crazy crowded and there was 4 of us, I figured we would spend our entire lunch waiting for a table. We had been standing there for about 2 minutes when a waiter came over and led us to a table. He wouldn’t stop staring at me and if he caught my eye he would smile.

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